AN OPEN LETTER TO THE VERONICAS

Dear Veronicas,

First of all, let me get the obligatory gushing fan stuff out of the way. Great, now we can get onto more pressing issues. I understand that every pop act needs to have an image. It's been going on since the fifties, and it's certainly not going to change any time soon. Some artists take to an image like a duck to water.. Westlife, for example; happy-go-lucky fellas just out for a good time. They sold three albums on this premise, and brought joy into the lives of teenage girls all over the world. Unfortunately though, images will invariably run their course.. Making people happy is fairly un-cool at the moment, so the lads had to re-invent themselves. Aware that turning into a hardcore rap group might not be the smoothest of transitions, Westlife chose to abandon their audience of young teenage girls. Their new target: the mothers of the young teenage girls. Nice one.

Other artists seem to have a slightly harder time of it. Take Human Nature. Poor guys. It seems that everywhere they turn, someone else has beaten them to it. First there was the Backstreet Boys idea. Then the 98 Degrees idea. Then the N'Sync idea, complete with video clip where the screen shook when they jumped on the floor. Now they seem to think they're The Temptations. And in between every image adjustment, they always find the time to go on the Today show and sing that Earth Angel song acapella. Yet, as muddled and ever changing as their image is, I can always get my head around it. And I guess this is why I'm writing to you..


Now, I understand the sister thing.. S2S milked that to critical acclaim a couple of years back. And I totally get the whole lesbian thing.. I think Tatu showed us all what a profitable market that was. But to try and pull both of these off at once? I know you, like, haven't kissed or anything like that.. Because that's like, eww.. But you do seem to hold hands a lot, and I think I'm yet to see a photo shoot where yours bodies aren't pressed up against each other, or at least touching in some way. Initially, the idea of an incestuous female couple storming the pop charts kinda left an unsavoury taste in my mouth. But then I tried to put myself inside the head of your average teenage boy. I watched some football, ate some Maccas, started thinking about those twins next door.. Bam. There it is. The ultimate semi-pubescent male fantasy.

In short, I think you're onto a real winner here. And the fact that you've survived for well over a year without any rumours of boyfriends surfacing says a lot about your dedication. I only hope for your sake that this whole thing doesn't fizzle out as quickly as barber-shop did, otherwise a duet with John Farnham is on the cards, and it's all down hill from there.

Best wishes for the future,

Alex.